Amazed

Photo from Pinterest

Just last month, I was in a very dark place and felt no light was in sight. Physically, mentally, emotionally, I was on the verge of a breakdown. It ultimately led me to do the one thing I thought would be best for me: let go.

When I let go, I turned to God. I'm not very religious; I guess you could say that I'm more spiritual, choosing to see God as a force that works in the universe. So when things don't make sense to me, when the world doesn't seem right, I find myself turning to Him more than ever. So this time around, I prayed. I asked for signs, and as I mentioned in a past post, He gave me so many. For once, I let go of my control freak tendencies and let Him take the wheel.

The past month has been simply amazing. I mean, check this out:

1. I told my friends about my plan to freelance, and everyone replied with leads and opportunities.

2. I blogged about freelancing, then a former colleague contacted me to write a feature article about things you didn't know you can get for free that's due tomorrow.
- I asked for leads on Facebook, and people I didn't expect to respond helped me out.
- I went to Fridays Eastwood to follow a lead, and while I was waiting for the supervisor, I was wondering where to eat afterwards. I ended up being served a huge club sandwich, on the house.
- I ran into some difficulty writing the article and decided to send in whatever I had so far. Just as I was wondering how I could manage to revise in time for tomorrow's deadline, I'm told that my deadline will be extended until Monday.

3. A few days after getting the first writing gig, another former colleague contacted me to also write a feature article, this time a personality profile on moms who pursued their dreams.
- Initially, I hesitated because I wasn't sure how I could handle being employed full-time, writing one article, and now this one. But despite coming out on the same issue month, this new assignment had a deadline that was right after the first article.
- Out of four moms to interview, my schedule only permitted me to commit to one. Lo and behold, the last mom is free on the holiday, so I can do that too! Just when I thought I could only handle one, it turns out I can do two out of four!

4. The reality started sinking in and I started to worry about the state of my finances.
- God gave me the perfect job: it's challenging and requires a big amount of commitment, but only requires me to come to the office twice a week and is flexible enough to allow me to accommodate more freelance writing gigs. Despite it being a part-time gig, it still gives me a regular salary. And I start September 2, which means I no longer have to worry about September being a dry spell!

5. Everyone I've talked to about my plans for the future has been supportive, making me appreciate having my family and friends behind me in all this.

How amazing to realize that He really does answer prayers and that He really will provide for me.

The uncertain and unpredictable future is less scary now, because I know that no matter what happens, I have Him to count on.